Pulpu

On the wall next to my vision board, is an epitaph.

I made this epitaph during my art therapy session, and I want to share how this eventually helped me with making the right decisions for myself.

The epitaph translates as follows:

However foolish it is, I practiced love, and worked hard for a person’s change.

Right below the epitaph, I wrote “warmth” as my core value.

This epitaph has helped me for the past several months to stay focused, grounded, and be more confident in my decision makings.

To make an epitaph, I basically summed up how I want others to remember me, and reflected on my actions and decisions that led me to where I am now. I reflected on my tendencies, and what drives me as a person. Then these reflections distilled into finding my core values.

Making an epitaph is not just useful in discovering about yourself, but it serves as important guides towards making the right decisions.

For instance, few months ago, I suddenly had an urge to make a youtube channel to review DIY products online. Here are some things that influenced my deicision:

• Many youtube videos that flooded my algorithm about side hustles, and there are some channels that suggested making a review channel.
• I decided that, because I’m good at DIY projects, I know how to edit videos, and I’ve grown a youtube channel before, I should pursue this challenge.
• Plus, I needed some extra income.

I purchased a phone case DIY kit, filmed and edited the video, made a new channel, and uploaded the youtube shorts video. I set up the social media posts too. This all happened only in several hours.

Taking on this project made sense, and there’s nothing wrong with using my skills to earn extra money.

However, in the midst of it all, I looked at my epitaph hanging next to my desktop. That’s when I realized that I didn’t make this decision based on my core values.

“Was I really driven to change people’s lives, and care for people with this DIY channel?”

If I was making this DIY review channel out of joy and love for entertaining people, I would have continued with my project. But I realized that I made this decision based on anxiety about money and I somehow convinced myself that I was doing this to use my skills. I felt a bit embarrassed that I got carried away and ignored my core values. I deleted the channel right there and then. That DIY channel had potential, but it was worth giving up when the other option was to spend my time and energy living by my values.

The epitaph also helped me to be more confident and determined about my current career.

I always understood that I chose teaching because I liked what I do, and I was good at it. But like you read earlier, I get side-tracked by other projects really easily.

But since I wrote my epitaph uncovered my core values, I felt more determined to put my energy and focus on my teaching career. I understood that the education path I chose was the best suited to live by my values. I felt more driven and alive to know that I’m living as someone that I want to be remembered as. Then I also became more confident in my teaching and my interactions with my students because I felt very alive and present to be living by my values in my workplace.

The epitaph also helped me to put clear purpose in other projects that I want to pursue, and make decisions accordingly.

In 2022, I started my platypus illustration, called Pulpu. I started it off as a webtoon by uploading the stories on webtoon websites and instagram. But by 2023, I felt burnt out. In hindsight, I don’t think I was driven by my core values. A bit similarly to the DIY channel, I was more driven by the fact that I have skills that could potentially make income, and prove myself as a prolific illustrator.

While I focused on teaching for the past few months, I revisited how my core values can align with what I love to do, which is art. I struggled to figure out how my art can have purpose that is meaningful to me.

I was doing some research about reading and English aquisition, and about how reading is the most important ways students aquire the language. Then it hit me, that in order for me to be at a service to other people, I can make stories for children to encourage more reading!

Then the drive kicked in again. I figured out a way to enrich another person’s life with the art that I do.

I started drawing again, I started blogging, and I’m on my way to make my online store. What used to feel like a burden now feels more like a fun challenge and learning experience.

Here are some ways to make an epitaph.

1. write down your achievements
2. write down what drives you
3. write down what inspires you
4. write down who you want to be remembered as
5. what fundamental belief and values drive your actions and deicisions?
6. observe patterns and recurring themes
7. write te epitaph in few words.

In conclusion, we think we are making good decisions by looking at our skills that can create value for others to appreciate. But what really drives us is our internal purpose and motivation, and that comes from core values.

Reflect on your core values, and make a short epitaph.

If you can, please like this post and comment what your epitaph might be, and how that could help you with your own decision makings!

Here are some guiding questions:

1. Who do you want to be remembered as? Make a short epitaph and write down your core value as well.
2. How can this epitaph help you make the right decisions?
3. How can this epitaph help you to feel more confident with your decisions you’ve already made?
4. What are some ways you can align your values to your current work or project? What changes should you make?